Self Publishing. A dream or a nightmare?

I have been writing for as long as I can remember. Stories have always been a part of me, and while publishing one has always been a dream, I quickly discovered that the journey can sometimes feel like a nightmare.

At first, I imagined I could do it all myself. I wanted to write and illustrate the entire book, handling every detail from words to pictures. But after many long days of trying, I realized my design skills could not capture the imagination and charm I wanted for children. That was my first hard lesson: sometimes you have to let go and trust someone else’s talent.

There is an old Lebanese saying: “Give your bread to the baker, even if he eats half of it.” The meaning is simple. When you need something done well, trust the expert, even if it costs more. At least you will end up with good bread, instead of wasting flour, time, and effort trying (and failing) to bake it yourself.

Hiring an illustrator turned out to be the best decision I could have made. My vision came alive in a way I never could have achieved alone.

Lesson 1: There is wisdom in delegating to skilled people instead of stubbornly trying to do everything yourself.

Then came formatting for Kindle and paperback. I thought, “How hard can it be?” But no matter how many times I resized, re-exported, and re-uploaded, something was always off. The paperback margins were wrong, the size did not fit, and frustration quickly set in. Eventually, I had to admit defeat and hire someone to fix it.

Lesson 2: Your time and energy are better spent on what you do best: writing.

And now I am at marketing marketing, the part no one really warns you about. With self-publishing, you are not just the author, you are also the marketing team. I am learning through trial and error, testing strategies, and figuring out what actually helps readers find my book. Some days it feels overwhelming, but the joy of hearing that someone loved the story makes it all worth it.

So, is self-publishing a dream or a nightmare? Honestly, it is both. It tests your patience and resilience, but it also gives you full control and the deep satisfaction of seeing your work out in the world. Every challenge, every mistake, and every small victory adds up to a journey that is uniquely yours.

If you are considering self-publishing, know this: it is not easy, but it is empowering. And when you finally hold your book in your hands, every stumble along the way feels like part of the story you were meant to tell.